Dancing With The Stars: Muy Caliente!

Last night's Dancing With the Stars' Latin night was soooo spicy and sultry and sexy and sensual and I'll stop now before, well, I'll just stop. Yummy yum yum yum! I definitely needed a cold shower by the end of the night. Or perhaps I need to get out more. It's one of those but I don't want to think about it right now.

Marie & Jonathan were the first couple of the night to dance and they attempted the samba. Well, they did the samba but I didn't think it was all that. Before the judges could finish telling them that though, Marie passed out live on stage!!! It was really scary but after a very long commercial break, Tom reappeared to tell us she was OK - she just fainted. All is right in Osmond world. Marie & Jonathan received a 7-7-7 for their effort.

Next up was Jane & Tony with their rhumba. I believe the judges were still in shock over Marie's light-headedness and that caused them to be way over-generous. Hello! Jane sang the song they were dancing to while they danced. They stayed in the same place on the stage for practically the entire routine. It was a very pretty but very boring dance. The judges didn't think so though and gave them 8-9-9 for a 26 out of 30.

Mark & Kym followed up that boring dance with an "I Dream of Jeanie" themed samba. It was muy cute and muy fun. The judges loved it but thought Mark was still too stodgy. They got 7-7-7 for a 21 out of of 30.

Sabrina & Mark danced the sheets off of their rhumba. So hot and so steamy. Now that is what I'm talkin' about. They received a 9-9-10 score from the judges for a 28 out of 30.

Jennie & Derek were up next and she gave her samba her all. She was definitely better at shaking her "fun stuff" thanks to her lessons. Jennie has improved so much in the last few weeks. I think I'm back on her bandwagon. They were rewarded with a 8-9-8 for a 25 out of 30.

Now Helio & Julianne. Their practice session pre-dance video seemed to come out of a bad adult movie. He picked her up in a Lamborghini. They danced on the beach. For their rhumba, I can certainly tell you that there was nothing left to the imagination when it came to the pants he wore. I thought it was hot. The judges? They didn't think so. H&J only received a 8-7-8 score for a total of 23 out of 30. That was an absolute disgrace! *wink*

Mel & Maks (who were both sick) samba'd their hearts out. Them dancing to a Spice Girls song was a perfect fit and it was wonderful. I loved it! It was a very fun and very energetic routine. The judges loved it too and said it was the best samba of the night (and I agree). They received the best scores of the night: 10-9-10 for a 29 out of 30.

Cameron & Edyta were the last couple to dance and I was reaching for ice cubes before they finished their rhumba. Oh my! Watching them dance was almost like watching them have sex onstage. It was that good. Carrie Ann said one of Edyta's feet came off the ground though (bah humbug) so their scores were lower than what I would have given them. They were given 8-9-9 for a 26 out of 30.

Tomorrow evening, one of these couples will be out of the competition and Jennifer Lopez will be milking the screen time. Did I really just type that?

Who do you think should turn in their dancing shoes next?